You Know You're Old When....

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Once again, my friend Steve managed to lighten my day with a chuckle by sending me the following e-mail. I will NOT tell you, how many of the following items to which I can relate.

'OLD' IS WHEN....
Your sweetie says, 'Let's go upstairs
and make love,' and you answer,
'Pick one; I can't do both!'

'OLD' IS WHEN....
Your friends compliment you
on your new alligator shoes
and you're barefoot..

'OLD' IS WHEN... A sexy babe or hunk catches your fancy
and your pacemaker opens the garage door.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
Going braless
pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
You don't care where your spouse goes,
just as long as you don't have to go along.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police

'OLD' IS WHEN...
Getting a little action'
means you don't need to take any fiber today.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
'Getting lucky' means you find your car
in the parking lot.

'OLD' IS WHEN....
An 'all nighter' means not getting up
to use the bathroom.

AND

'OLD' IS WHEN....
You are not sure these are jokes